It’s been a year since I joined this base,
And it’s a been a good year since the Father started the process of taking me to my very core, of peeling me like an onion so I could see who he is in me and where is my place as son.
Now that I look back I recognize a huge lack of vision, but also a growing feeling of restlessness with the life I was living. My fear of losing control forced me to make decisions that lead me down a wrong path and this very same fear was destroying my heart. Coming to this place was precisely what I needed and is in this place where the Father is opening my eyes to a broader and bigger picture of what life is.
All I can say now is that I’m done with myself and with the life I was living.
As you can read in my bio, I grew up in a Caucasian/Spanish family and it was really good; through them I learned a good portion of what I know now. However, there were moments when some of the members of my family couldn’t stand close to me since I wasn’t ‘one of them’ because of the color of my skin and my features. I grew up with racism within my family and within my culture.
Yes; Guatemala has also suffered the symptoms of racism since the very beginning its birth.
The Lord redeems
When I came to the Lord, I thought that all these issues were gone; I thought that once you release something in your heart you don’t need to walk through the same stuff again. But the ways of the Lord are amazingly beautiful. Because we are meant to walk in power and the confidence that is found in him.
In the blog I posted called “Dream of angels” I shared a conversation I had with the Father, there’s a part that I didn’t share in that moment, when I came to the Father and I said that I wanted a family, his reply was to me, shocking, because it brought a lot of things from the past to the surface, this is a tiny bit of what was said that night:
“Do not put a box around the way I redeem people… this is my gift to you, all these people who are partnering with you in this journey, they’re not only missionaries, they are your family. My family.”
Since a year ago I’ve had a beautiful and amazing family, since a year ago I’ve been living and doing life with these amazing people! Being with them has taken away the fear of being rejected, of being the object of jokes and harmful words. I’ve learned to become a true member of the most amazing family ever. (Who in the world wouldn’t like to have a family with people from almost every corner of the world?)
Through them I’ve learned & received:
Trust. Love. Strength. Courage. FREEDOM. VOICE. Self-confidence.
A place on the heart of each of them.
Affirmation. Acceptance. LIFE. The gift of obedience.
Doing life with them has grown me in areas that I never imagined, has given me that part that my heart was missing. How freeing that is? The Father gives us what we need not what we want, and let me add this: “He knows best.”
But, why? Why now? Why like this?
True life is birthed out of family. Out of being truly know and seen.
There are neither sons nor daughters without family.
True worship is birthed out of family.
(Remember the story of Abraham & Isaac going to the altar to worship God even in the midst of trial and pain?)
There are thousands of orphans around the world. How are we going to bring them into family if we don’t know how to interact in family? If we ourselves are still living with an orphan spirit?
Around the world many people worship the free and independent mindset, meaning there’s a lot of people seeking approval and striving for recognition based on what they can accomplish.
I’ve been in that place before! I was one of those!
It’s not about what we can do in our strength but grasping what the heart of the Father has for us.
“But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.”
[Matthew 6:33 NKJV]
I’m thankful now for how the Father brings us closer, I’m thankful for how he loves us.
I’m thankful for how I see family here.
“But He answered them, saying, “Who is My mother, or My brothers?” And He looked around in a circle at those who sat about Him, and said, “Here are My mother and My brothers! For whoever does the will of God is My brother and My sister and mother.”
[Mark 3:33’35 NKJV]
Now, in this new season of my life I just want to thank God for the life of this amazing couple who tenderly brought me close to the heart of the Father by just being present and loving on me without boundaries, without expecting anything back. Jonathan & Ann Little, Thank you so much. You bring so much joy in my life, and both of you are like the parental figure I was needing.
Thank you Noe for being a brother and pouring out your wisdom and love in my life. You are the big brother that I look up to, always.
Thank you Kacie for always have a heart to listen to my stories and the things that are happening in my life.
Thank you Kristen for that encouragement that I can find in your words, for allowing the Father use you to bring life into my heart.
Thank you Kristen René for your Joy and laughter, you heart blesses mine.
Thank you Jenny for your peace and your heart for honor those around you.
Thank you to all the team members that have come to this base and have become part of this family, there’s so many people to be thankful for, the list would be endless.
I see family. The Father has given us that privilege.
Without them I wouldn’t be able to walk in confidence towards my call to the nations!
Thank you Father.
“For the earnest expectation of the creation eagerly waits for the revealing of the sons of God.”
– Romans 8:19 –
